He moved! (I am such a goose.)

Blessed be the Lord, and happy all heavens! I can stop worrying now. My baby moved!

You laugh. Well, I suppose I was being a bit irrational, but I really was worried. Seth says that I'm not happy unless I have something to worry about, and I'm beginning to see his point. See, all my pregnancy manuals said that I could expect to feel the baby move between weeks 16 and 20, and here it is, week 21, and I had felt nothing! Oh there were little squiggly feelings, but nothing that couldn't be attributed to normal symptoms of pregnancy. Of course I was beginning to worry.

So yesterday, while I was dressing, I happened to look down at my belly, and right as I looked, lo and behold, a little section of my lower abdomen poked out for just a second and then poked back in. There's no way that's gas! I tried to show Seth, but baby wasn't interested in performing for Daddy just then. Of course, I was all excited, and Seth got another laugh at my expense. He says that if I survive the first year of motherhood, I'm going to make a great mom, meaning that I'll probably give myself a heart attack before baby's first birthday. I know that I'm being completely irrational, but I've was never that rational to begin with. This is a baby we're talking about here! Everything about them is cause for worry and celebration. It's a survival mechanism! God planned it that way!

Speaking of irrational baby excitement, do I look pregnant yet? I know it's not the greatest picture (I haven't figured out the automated part of our camera yet), but it's clear enough to say one way or the other. The ladies at church were all saying how glad they are that I'm showing at last. Then they all had to tell me how big they got before the end. I've got a ways to go.

And finally, two pictures of fall.

I live in such a beautiful place that even I can take pretty pictures.

Back in the business world.

It feels good to be doing something again. Last Friday, I was feeling well enough to sub all day, and today I'm going to try a half day with 5th graders. I know it's not much in the way of income, but it is much in the way of activity, and it feels good to know that I'm not being a complete drag.

My twenty week check up is tomorrow, and the big ultrasound is Thursday. I will post ultrasound results sometime next week. Now I have to go make my lunch.

Love you all.
Jennifer

Update on mural.

It's been almost a week since I worked on my mural. I was hoping to work on it some more before I posted pictures, but I suddenly realized how woefully ignorant I am of many things pregnancy and have decided to spend the next couple of days reading about the decisions I'm going to have to make before Seth leaves again.

So here are the pictures from my latest effort. The camera was on night setting, and I didn't know it, so pardon the blurriness. We added in the green background. Seth and I painted this part together, and he thought that background meant it should cover the whole wall. I was thinking more that green should be where leaves go. We'll see who was right when more of it gets filled in. The next step here is to extend the arms of the white tree ("one white tree." sorry. I couldn't help myself. Anyway, there will be more before I'm done. ) and paint in its gold leaves.

Here is a view from the corner, and I'd like some opinions on it. Seth says we don't need any more trees in that corner. He likes the way the mural fades away into nothing. I think that blue expanse needs at least a small bush, maybe a sumac or something red. Of course, there will probably be a table in front of it, but tables can be moved. I'd like to know that something is there.

After we resolve what will go in the other corner, this corner will get its own tree treatment. Part of the background is already in place, but I don't want to put a lot of green in until I know how the branches are going to fall.

So that's progress. It makes my kitchen feel smaller to have all this activity on the walls. I think so, at least. Seth doesn't notice it.

Dreaming pink!

Since the day this baby was conceived, I have been certain that it was a boy. Lately, I haven't been as certain. And then last night . . .

Last night, I dreamed that I was walking into a room that was full of random bits of furniture just setting about like it had been moved in but not organized. I was considerably more pregnant. There was an enormous cherry wood mirror with a curvy top lying on its side. There were bits of newspaper on the floor. There was a closet with a very curvy closet organizer (It looked like the skeleton of a waterslide.) with branches, and on each branch hung a different baby outfit. And there was lots of furniture in the background that I didn't take notice of because I was too busy staring at the walls. The walls were --- pink. A nice bubblegum/peppermint pink. And the baby clothes had pink highlights -- ribbons, footies, flowers, etc. And there was no reason for that mirror to ever sit in a boy's room. Completely female all the way.

I am certain that the room was a room in my house, though it didn't resemble the room we have set up for the baby. (It was bigger, for one thing. I don't think that mirror would fit comfortably in our spare room.) I am pretty certain it was a room for my baby (though an old friend of mine just learned she's having a girl, maybe twins). The whole dream was like walking into a birthday present.

So now what do I do? Sit still and wait, I suppose. It's not as if I can do anything about it. The ultrasound isn't for another week and a half. I begin to see why babies a hundred years ago were dressed in white for the first few months. Much simpler.

And the dream might just be addressing my anxiety about not being mentally ready for a girl. I will admit that my stomach was awfully awry last night. I also dreamed about marching bands in black and white workout uniforms assembling next door to my parents' old house led by an old classmate of mine who played an instrument that looked like a black rubber bugel. (She played the flute in high school.) But somehow that dream was just chaotic. The baby dream felt like there was more to it. It felt like it meant something to me. I can never figure out whether or not to trust pregnancy dreams or not.

New Friends

I've added several new blogs to my list of blogs. None of these people are actually new friends to me, but I thought maybe some of you would like to get to know each other.
Two of the new blogs are care sites affiliated with hospitals. Uncle Randy, who lives in Iowa, and Montana Crosby, who lives here in Silverdale and is supported by my church, are both recovering from cancer, and I know they would appreciate prayer.
Kelly is a friend from college who works with underprivileged and incarcerated girls in Grand Rapids. It's really cool to see the progress she makes.
Leann is a good friend who has insight into the prophetic. Her blog is chiefly about miraculous happenings and prophetic dreams.
So if you need some new reading material, check out one of my friends.

Catch you later.
Jennifer