Tuesday, March 10, 2015

A quick compendium of stress lowering phrases for the overly sensitive



It's those little moments that can make the biggest changes in our outlook.  We all need less stress in our lives.  Everyone knows that. But I didn't really get started thinking about ways to reduce stress (not in a practical way, at any rate) until my chiropractor suggested that an overactive adrenal gland might be the reason my muscles cramp up more than usual.  I really didn't want to take yet another supplement, so I decided that a lifestyle change was in order.  Finally.  It really bugs my husband when a random mention of something that he's been telling me for years makes me affect a change I should have been making. 

But how to reduce stress?  Obviously, a change of schedule wasn't an option.  Most of what I do is wrapped up in family, home, and paying off student loans.  That can't change.  And really, I don't do as much as many women I know.  So the answer lies in changing my state of mind.  I've been saying the following phrases to myself a lot lately. 

1.  Why not?  I try to ask this one as an honest question.  If no reason surfaces, then go for it. 
2.  It's nothing personal.  That random person who frowned when he saw me was thinking of his taxes or his truck repairs or his soon-to-be son-in-law.  It had nothing to do with me.
3.  There's no reason that this can't turn out fine. 
4.  It's my fault.  I'm sorry.  A lot of stress comes from trying to shift blame, even if only in one's own mind. 
5.  It's not my fault.  Sometimes it's someone else's fault.  And sometimes, it's just something outside the control of any one human being. 
6.  It's over.  Because the feelings from random events can linger far too long.  Even if the events aren't random, like a disappointing moment with a child or a boneheaded mistake, there's a statute of limitations on how long we ought to feel bad about it once it's done.
7.  This is me, and I like it.  I can't count the number of people that I envy, not for what they have, but for who they are.  I wish I did things a hundred ways differently, and I often kick myself for using the habits and preferences that are normal to me.  There's nothing wrong with growing, but I'm finally coming to accept that some parts of me are foundational and were intended to be. 
8.  All will be well, and all will be well, and all manner of things will be well.  Julian of Norwich had great faith, having seen the love of Christ up close and personal in her visions.  The people who are closest to God have the greatest confidence in his ability to make all things new and good. 
9.  It's a part of the world I live in, and I like it.   Few things are more stressful than sitting in criticism on life.  The constant inflow of information these days can incline us to look down the more provincial aspects of our lives.  That's just sad. 
10.  I'm happy.  Because unhappiness isn't as sophisticated as it's often reputed to be.  Sometimes the happy person isn't the one who hasn't delved into the situation fully.  Sometimes the happy person is the one who has considered the situation fully, counted his or her blessings, taken positive action, and moved on. 

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