It's those little moments that can make the biggest changes
in our outlook. We all need less stress
in our lives. Everyone knows that. But I
didn't really get started thinking about ways to reduce stress (not in a
practical way, at any rate) until my chiropractor suggested that an overactive
adrenal gland might be the reason my muscles cramp up more than usual. I really didn't want to take yet another
supplement, so I decided that a lifestyle change was in order. Finally. It really bugs my husband when a random
mention of something that he's been telling me for years makes me affect a
change I should have been making.
But how to reduce stress?
Obviously, a change of schedule wasn't an option. Most of what I do is wrapped up in family, home,
and paying off student loans. That can't
change. And really, I don't do as much
as many women I know. So the answer lies
in changing my state of mind. I've been
saying the following phrases to myself a lot lately.
1. Why not? I try to ask this one as an honest
question. If no reason surfaces, then go
for it.
2. It's nothing
personal. That random person who frowned
when he saw me was thinking of his taxes or his truck repairs or his soon-to-be
son-in-law. It had nothing to do with
me.
3. There's no reason
that this can't turn out fine.
4. It's my
fault. I'm sorry. A lot of stress comes from trying to shift
blame, even if only in one's own mind.
5. It's not my
fault. Sometimes it's someone else's
fault. And sometimes, it's just
something outside the control of any one human being.
6. It's over. Because the feelings from random events can
linger far too long. Even if the events
aren't random, like a disappointing moment with a child or a boneheaded
mistake, there's a statute of limitations on how long we ought to feel bad
about it once it's done.
7. This is me, and I
like it. I can't count the number of
people that I envy, not for what they have, but for who they are. I wish I did things a hundred ways
differently, and I often kick myself for using the habits and preferences that
are normal to me. There's nothing wrong
with growing, but I'm finally coming to accept that some parts of me are
foundational and were intended to be.
8. All will be well,
and all will be well, and all manner of things will be well. Julian of Norwich had great faith, having
seen the love of Christ up close and personal in her visions. The people who are closest to God have the
greatest confidence in his ability to make all things new and good.
9. It's a part of the
world I live in, and I like it. Few things are more stressful than sitting in
criticism on life. The constant inflow
of information these days can incline us to look down the more provincial
aspects of our lives. That's just
sad.
10. I'm happy. Because unhappiness isn't as sophisticated as
it's often reputed to be. Sometimes the
happy person isn't the one who hasn't delved into the situation fully. Sometimes the happy person is the one who has
considered the situation fully, counted his or her blessings, taken positive
action, and moved on.
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